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I’m scared to tell you these three things

I’m scared to tell you these three things

It’s another day of Vlogmas and I’m going a bit out of order but today’s prompt is: I’m scared to tell you these three things.

And just like I do with anything I’m scared about, I’ll jump straight in…

(I literally do this. I was once scuba diving at night in Australia and I had to do a night dive to get my advanced scuba diving qualification. it was pitch black and the boat was surrounded by sharks and everyone else was hovering around the back of the boat I just wriggled through the crowd of nervous divers and jumped straight in. I was terrified but I knew I just had to get in and get it over and done with to get that qualification. It was awful – I do not recommend scuba diving in the dark!)



Anyway, here we go….


I love being a blogger so much it scares me

Do you know why it scares me? Because if this all goes tits up and I need to go out and get a ‘proper job’ again I would probably fall to pieces. I can’t even imagine going back to a 40 hour workweek with limited annual leave and a substandard salary.

The thought of it absolutely terrifies me.

This job and this incredible career seemed to emerge out of nowhere and it terrifies me that it might disappear as quickly as it materialised.

I’m really trying to diversify my income and grow my skills and keep producing quality content to ensure I stay in this business for as long as I can.



I’d love to spend a year just travelling in the UK

I’ve had this dream for a long time that I’d love to spend a whole year just travelling around the UK. I’d love to spend 12 months seeking out the best hotels and the quirkiest glamping sites. I’d love to climb mountains and explore cities and showcase our gorgeous coastline and I’d love to do it all from the comfort of my own car so I can take the whole family with no stress.

The reason I’m scared to tell you this isn’t because that’s a weird dream. The reason I’m scared is because of the reason I haven’t done it yet – and that’s simply because I can’t afford to do that and no one is going to pay me to do it.

I earn a living through travelling the world, not through staying at home.

It’s still something I’d love to do one day, it’s just today is not the day.



I have an identity crisis approximately twice a month

Before I begin with this one I need to say a big thank you to Elle Croft because she is the person I turn to once or twice a month when I’m having my identity crisis.

It goes a little like this:

What am I doing with my life?

Am I doing the right thing?

Am I still enjoying this? Should I do something else? Should I do something more meaningful? Am I a good person? Could I earn more money if I did this? Do I want to earn more money? Yes, I think I do want more money. No, I don’t need money to be happy. Money doesn’t buy happiness. Should I run away and live in the mountains? I miss London, should I move back to London? I love my kids so much, do you think I should have more kids? Urgh no, I couldn’t handle more kids. Oh but I do like babies. Could I be a travel blogger with three kids? Should I be a family blogger? Would more people be interested if I was a lifestyle blogger? I want to be more environmentally friendly. But I really enjoy shopping. Do I still enjoy travelling? Can you really combine a hobby and a business?

And Elle will patiently listen to me ramble on, giving insightful words of wisdom until I feel like myself again!

I’ll then feel like I’ve got my shit together and I’ll be all focused and inspired and motivated to get on with my life and then a few weeks later I’ll see someone doing something cool and I’ll think to myself, ‘That looks fun, I want to do that, can I do that?’ and the whole thing starts all over again!



Read the rest of my Vlogmas posts here:


On being honest online

The best advice I’ve ever been given

I flipping love being a mum

The worst piece of advice I’ve ever been given

Why I’m happy

Why I blog

I’m scared to tell you these three things

Tammy Chrzan

Friday 21st of December 2018

I have been following your blog for some time now, and I have to say, that I don't think you were thinking clearly when you jumped into the water at night with sharks!! LOL... Whoa... I was like "Wait, what?!"... You could have been a tasty morsel! :) But you survived and were able to write this post, I have to tell you that it's made you more real. Let me explain, I know you're "real", but you see alot of bloggers that just post about their trips... look at me do this... look at me do that, and though the pictures are beautiful, it's like the audience can't always relate, because here we are raising kids and earning our paychecks. When you share with the readers about how you are struggling, how you keep it real... that's when we think "OHHH SHE'S JUST LIKE US!!".. and I think more people will want to read when they can relate to a real person. Thank you for the great post! Tammy x


Sunday 23rd of December 2018

Tammy you have just made my day. Thank you so much for this comment. It isn't always easy, especially when I go on press trips surrounded by these gorgeous, glamorous girls who are essentially models! But I'm glad you think this!


Thursday 20th of December 2018

Thank you for sharing these! I COMPLETELY relate to the "if this all goes tits up I'm screwed" feeling. I left the traditional 9-5 world and the thought of having to go back scares the crap out of me! The good news is, even if your current business were to somehow stop working, you're an entrepreneur. You can start something else. Those skills are invaluable!


Friday 21st of December 2018

Yes definitely. I sometimes think there'd be no work for a 'blogger' but I'm sure there's plenty of work for an online marketer and writer!

Elle Croft

Thursday 20th of December 2018

You're so welcome, because you KNOW I'm just as guilty of this, and you always THANK YOU. Also, this is not going tits up and you won't need an office job. You've got this!! x


Friday 21st of December 2018

Best comment of the day :) Thank you!